Negotiation Secrets For CFOs: A Conversation With Christy Rutherford

I recently had the opportunity to sit down with Christy Rutherford, a recognized expert in negotiations and leadership development. Christy has helped leaders across industries secure millions in salary increases, achieve work-life balance, and transform their professional trajectories. In our conversation, we explored a range of topics that are top-of-mind for CFOs—everything from negotiating compensation to fostering self-care and building trust in high-stakes scenarios. Whether you’re looking to advocate for yourself or your organization, Christy’s insights offer actionable strategies that every CFO can use to lead with confidence and clarity.

Many CFOs are seasoned negotiators for their companies but may struggle when it comes to negotiating for themselves. What key steps should CFOs take when negotiating their salary or promotion?

It’s common for leaders to advocate for everybody else, but when it comes time to advocate for themselves, that’s when they run into problems. The goal is to look in the mirror, know that you deserve it, and look at the value you’ve added to the organization. Being a leader is tough and thankless, and most leaders are exhausted.

When you negotiate for yourself, your unconscious perspective of self shows up, and the negative voice kicks in and says that you’re not good enough, you haven’t done enough, or you don’t understand your value. Uncertainty in how your leaders and team perceive you also creates self-imposed barriers to claiming your full value.

Lesson – Start quantifying the professional things you’ve done and advocate for yourself just as fiercely and confidently as you advocate for the people around you.

You often emphasize the importance of self-care in achieving professional success. How can CFOs, who are typically working high-pressure jobs, incorporate self-care?

Self-care is a learned skill for leaders and high achievers. At this point, executives, leaders, and CEOs are resigning and leaving their jobs at record rates because they haven’t learned how to take care of themselves adequately.

I’ve recommended three things to my clients worldwide, and it’s resulted in $20 million in salary raises and small business revenue. These habits have also saved 30 marriages and alleviated stress-related medical conditions, such as high blood pressure, diabetes, fibroids, and lupus.

If you can implement these three habits, you will live a better quality of life, significantly improve your mental and physical health, and be more present with your spouse, partner, children, and parents. You will also be more productive and effective at work, increasing your promotability.

The number one habit is to meditate for five minutes three times a week, not seven times a week. You don’t have to burn incense or chant. Listen to guided meditation for five minutes, where a calming voice tells you to come into your body, feel your fingers and toes, and get you to relax.

There are thousands on YouTube for free. You can do this when you’re getting out of the shower. Some of my clients hide in the closet or meditate in their cars before they go into the office or before they walk into the house after work. Taking a moment to decompress before walking into chaos is a conscious decision to prioritize your health, and let’s be honest, leadership is chaos.

The second habit, working out for 30 minutes three times a week, will significantly change your life, improve your mood, and give you the patience to manage multiple fires at work. Lastly, get eight hours of sleep three times a week.

While all of these are free and easy to do, it’s not so easy to get high achievers to believe they can incorporate self-care into their routines. That’s the work!

What common mistakes do executives, including CFOs, make when they approach salary negotiations, and how can they avoid them?

The first common mistake I see is when people say, “What are you going to give me?” or they don’t have a target in mind when they are looking for an increase in salary. When you ask, “What are you going to give me?” You’re leaving it up to someone else to determine your value, and you’re likely going to be disappointed. Be specific in your ask and expectations. If you want a 30% increase in your base pay or an overall increase of $20k or $200k, ask for it, and don’t be vague.

How can CFOs use market data and their unique value propositions to negotiate higher compensation packages successfully?

With market data, I’ve seen data with a gap of $200k in the same geographic area and job title, so for me, that may be a marker if someone is underpaid but being able to understand and clearly articulate your unique selling proposition is the Master Key.

Your Unique Selling Proposition will get you a higher wage because you’re talking about yourself, your expertise, and the value you bring to the organization. I recommend that you quantify three significant achievements you’ve had with the company in the past 12 – 18 months. They should center around how much revenue you’ve generated for the company, how much revenue you have saved, or how much time you have saved the company. Have you reduced turnover or done something exceptional that hasn’t been done before? It matters.

Can you quantify if you’ve added $2 million to the bottom line or if you’ve recouped $5 million of uncaptured revenue? You’ve provided tremendous value to the organization, and you should be able to capitalize on that. One of my clients created a program that saved an organization 5000 manager hours, and at $60 an hour, it saved the company $3 million. When he learned how to quantify his contributions, he got a promotion and a $90,000 salary raise in the first nine months at his new job.

After you’ve quantified three achievements, then ask for three things you want in return for it. “I want $100k added to my base pay, an extra week of vacation, and two personal development conferences. I want a more flexible schedule or to take a finance course at Harvard Business School. Ask for three things that are important to you at this juncture in your career and personal life.

In your experience, what role does confidence play in successful salary negotiations, and how can CFOs cultivate and project that confidence when advocating for themselves?

Advocating for yourself is a learned skill for leaders. Leaders are conditioned to include the team and say “we,” not I. But when it comes to salary negotiations, you’re talking about yourself, so confidence plays a significant role because if you don’t believe you deserve it, they don’t believe you deserve it. Some leaders will play on your fear if you’re nervous or unsure. But the fear is rooted in not understanding the value you’ve created for the organization.

Write down 20 things you’ve done in the past 18 – 24 months. This is hard for many people, but it’s imperative to be able to take credit for your work. Otherwise, you’re working harder to prove that you have value, but you’ve repeatedly demonstrated that value for years on end, but you haven’t claimed it or quantified it.

When you take the time to look at what you’ve done and celebrate it, that’s how you cultivate and project confidence. Confidence isn’t something that can be fabricated when you’re negotiating, especially with a seasoned negotiator and senior leader. You have to really BELIEVE and own how great you already are.

But to own how great you already are, write out 20 things you’ve done. Once you see how great you are, you’ll be able to confidently ask for what you deserve.

You’ve spoken about the need to set higher salary goals—often 30% or more. How should CFOs determine what’s an ambitious yet realistic goal when negotiating their compensation?

This goes back to your unique value proposition. If you’ve been overworked and underpaid for the past five years, then your current salary shouldn’t be the starting point for your value. With additional experience, achievements, and knowledge, you’ve appreciated in value. You are an appreciable asset.

If a Hermes bag can double its value in five years, what more can a CFO do? Someone who has dedicated their time and energy to solving problems, advocating for others, working 60 – 80 hours a week, saving the company money, leading teams, and providing tremendous value for the company.

Depending on the organization and the known budget for certain roles, 30% is the starting point. However, we have doubled 25 people’s salaries, many in the same organization, and this goes back to understanding and articulating your unique selling proposition.

Asking for a raise also allows you to see how your organization really feels about you. They can string you along and not pay you if you never verbally articulate the desire for an increase and a specific number. When you ask for a raise, you’re giving the organization the opportunity to express how they view you and your potential for upward mobility in the company.

Don’t get mad if you find the expectations misaligned; just be informed. If they don’t give you what you asked for or anything, and you really think that you deserve it, then it’s okay to start seeking other opportunities because organizations will value how you value yourself.

One of my clients recently got a $140,000 raise while thousands of people were being laid off. She saw a problem that she could solve for the organization and wrote a job description outlining how she was uniquely qualified to provide more value while not working as hard. She has twins under the age of two, so we first had to get her to implement the three self-care habits, along with a few other things like outsourcing cleaning, laundry, and meal prep for her family.

When she outsourced lower-value tasks, she had more room to mentally see how she could be more effective at work and use her unique skillset to solve a problem that needed to be addressed. She didn’t have to work harder to earn more money. Her value was already proven, and when she presented the idea to her leaders, they quickly agreed and gave her what she asked for.

When CFOs negotiate on behalf of their companies, whether it’s in M&A or with vendors, what are the key differences in approach from negotiating for their personal benefit?

The most significant difference between negotiating on behalf of their companies and negotiating for their benefit is, again, looking in the mirror and being able to self-advocate. It is always easier to share your experience and expertise as a professional representative of your company. But when you cannot do that for yourself, then a deficiency in your “personal growth” has been highlighted.

Leaders are heavily invested in time, money, and energy for professional development to achieve a certain level of success. You have all the certifications and degrees and a library of leadership books to strengthen your professional persona, but that came at the sacrifice of personal development.

Personal development is how you really feel about yourself, and that is clearly expressed during the conversations you have with yourself at two o’clock in the morning. Thinking that you could have done some things differently, led the team better, or handled a tense situation better with a colleague. Personal development will close the gap between your personal and professional self. That’s the equation to solve because the gap in how you see yourself is where you will be exploited during negotiations.

What negotiation techniques from executive-level salary discussions can CFOs apply when leading company-wide negotiations?

It’s similar to the insight offered earlier. Share the information in threes. This is who I am (three short bullet points to highlight your credentials/experience), this is what I’ve done (three short bullet points to highlight your top performance), and the three things that you’re going to require for that.

The same applies to company-wide negotiations. Clearly articulate the top results the company has gotten for its vendors or whoever it’s negotiating with, the three benefits they have for working with the company, and the three things they desire in return.

You have extensive experience in leadership development and organizational behavior. How can CFOs build a culture of transparency and trust in negotiations, both internally and externally?

Building a culture of transparency and trust in internal and external negotiations is really about having tough conversations. The promotion conversation should not occur once a year. It should be an ongoing conversation where no one is surprised. Your leadership team should know your short-term and long-term goals for the organization.

Internally, you build trust by having conversations about money and telling people where they fit in the organization and what they need to do to get a raise. These conversations are difficult for leaders, but they are imperative if you want to inspire trust and loyalty in your team.

Set up regular meetings with your leaders and direct reports so the conversation flows up and down and doesn’t get bottlenecked. Schedule a quarterly meeting with your leader and say, “We are in Q1. What are your goals for the quarter?”

When you get a sense of their goals, you ask, “How can I assist you with your goals for this quarter? Where do I fit?” Then, you share your goals for the quarter and ask, “Are these goals aligned with where you need me to be and best serve the organization?”

“What goals do you have for me this quarter?” Tell them if a salary increase or some benefit is expected. If the goal is for the next year, 18 months, or even six months, say, “I’d like to add 15% or 30% to my base pay. What do I need to do to achieve that?” This conversation should occur at the start of each quarter.

For the next quarter, have the meeting and say, “These are the priorities you had for me for the quarter.” “Did I meet the expectation? What could I have done better?” Then, ask the questions listed earlier for the beginning of the quarter.

Ask the questions upfront so you’re not being elusive or expecting something to happen that has never been expressed. You’re also putting them on notice that there is an expectation of an increase within a given time frame. Again, you’ll be able to see whether it’s possible for you in the organization, and if it’s not possible within the timeframe you desire, name another one. “Well, if it’s not possible in 2025, then what about 2026?”

It’s essential to have transparent conversations about your expectations, promotability, and upward mobility in that organization. If it’s not going to happen there, it can happen elsewhere.

When the topic of money comes up, neither party should be surprised because it’s a quarterly conversation. Transparency and trust are created through tactical and planned processes where everyone is on the same page.

Externally, the process should be similar, and transparency is having the conversation about what the expectations are and what you’re going to get.

How should CFOs handle negotiations when they are representing multiple stakeholders with conflicting interests, such as balancing the needs of shareholders, employees, and customers?

I took three negotiation classes at the Harvard Business School, and the last one was called Changing the Game: Negotiation and Competitive Decision-Making. This was my favorite negotiation course because in the first two if there was $1 million worth of value to be captured if I got $400k and the other person got $250k, I won. But in Changing the Game, you’d have to find the win-win and maximize the deal’s total value. So, in the scenario just listed, I would have lost because the total value captured between me and the other person was $650k, which means we left $350k of value uncaptured.

The conversations require a lot more work and maturity to maximize the total deal and get as close as possible to the $1 million marker in value. We had to get creative in offering other incentives that were important to the other person if we wanted to get more money in the deal. Even though it was difficult, everyone walked away satisfied.

For external negotiations, it’s important to understand the conflicting interests and desires of the shareholders, employees, and customers and have an open and honest conversation about what’s possible and what’s not possible. Understand that some feelings may get hurt.

But if people know that you’ve considered their wants and needs and get a clear sense of what’s possible and not possible based on the needs of others, it’s more palatable to have a 70% win if they understood that no one got 100%. So, they may be just as happy losing a little bit so everybody can win.

What advice do you have for CFOs who are looking to secure promotions or career advancements while also ensuring they don’t fall into the trap of overworking themselves?

Leaders are overworking themselves to prove they are valuable to the organization, but they aren’t capturing the value by asking. My clients earn more while working less, and we’ve done it again and again. You don’t have to work harder to get more money or to prove that you’re valuable at this point in your career. It’s about working smarter and taking care of yourself.

If you’re burning out, you’re not mentally capable of making great decisions all the time. Taking the time to sleep, meditate, and work out allows you to have a clear head and make great decisions the first time. It also gives you the clarity of thought and the clarity of mind to handle challenging situations and workplace conflicts with ease.

Executive burnout is at an all-time high, and while telling high achievers to get some sleep doesn’t garner wide praise, I had to learn this lesson the hard way. Twelve years ago, I burned out and resigned from my career with three and a half years left to retire with a full pension because I did not follow these self-care tips.

I worked 80 hours a week, including the weekends. Stressed-out people don’t crave apples, so the compound effect of eating cheesy/greasy foods, not working out, waking up exhausted, and drinking several cups of coffee before 10 am took a toll mentally and physically. While my team and I produced award-winning results, it came at a high cost.

I mentored 90 people outside of my office, had 160 people on my team, and mentored my six direct reports every night for up to three hours. Granted, 12 years later, they are in positions in the organization reserved for elite performers, but my catastrophic burnout was 100% preventable. It took me two years to recover physically, four years to recover mentally, and seven years to recover financially. I know FOR SURE that I could have been healthier, happier, and more effective if I had put just as much care into myself as I did to everyone around me.

Leadership is one of the greatest gifts a person can offer humanity, but it comes at a high cost. Leaders stretch themselves too thin, don’t make time for self-care, and rarely prioritize our mental and physical health. Working harder to get promoted is just like throwing more wood on a forest fire that’s already out of control. Another piece of wood is not going to move the needle forward.

If you want to stand out from your peers, be calm and harmonious. If you want to stand out in an interview panel, be a confident, calm, and harmonious leader. In As a Man Thinketh (written in the early 1900’s), James Allen said, “The strong, calm man is always loved and revered. He is like a shade-giving tree in a thirsty land or a sheltering rock in a storm. Who does not love a tranquil heart, a sweet-tempered, balanced life?”

When my clients ask for a promotion or interview for new roles, they are like shade-giving trees in rooms, and people roll out the red carpet to offer them anything that they want. A leader who intentionally learns self-care will write their own ticket for anything that they want.

You’ve mentioned the importance of having mentors and sponsors. How can CFOs develop a “Personal Board of Advisors,” and why is it critical for their professional development and negotiation success?

If leaders want to increase their earning potential and negotiate more effectively, they need a Personal Board of Advisors, which consists of mentors, sponsors, and a coach. I had 13 mentors and 20 or so sponsors in my previous career.

A mentor is someone who’s been where you want to go, and they can show you how to get there. I recommend getting mentors two levels above where you are because they’ve been there and can offer insight on how to solve your challenges and give you a different perspective quickly.

Leaders don’t always communicate in detail, so many problems could be quickly resolved if you had someone to decipher challenging scenarios with. A mentor has been where you are, so they can tell you about the different minefields and the traps of leadership and things that don’t, where not to step, and where not to go.

If you can’t find a mentor in your organization, seek someone in your industry by attending professional meetings and joining an association like the Chief Financial Officer’s Leadership Council.

A sponsor is someone who has power, and they will use it for you. You need to have a personal relationship with a sponsor because they are putting their reputation on the line when they mention your name, so they need to know you, like you, and trust you. A sponsor will put your name in the hat when it comes to discussing roles and opening doors for you. You may not always know someone is sponsoring you, but it will usually be someone with whom a relationship has been cultivated.

Be strategic in creating trusted, genuine, harmonious relationships with people who have input into your career and how it will go. If you don’t have direct access to a sponsor, then look for the promotability decision makers in your organization and build relationships with their friends and trusted colleagues. Look for a bridge or an olive branch to get an introduction to a potential sponsor and decision-makers in your organization.

Lastly, you need a coach, someone who’s on Team YOU. Mentors and sponsors have your best interests in your professional achievements, but leaders need someone who will hold you accountable for the personal goals you set for yourself. It can be a fitness coach, a therapist, a career coach, relationships, or parenting. Someone who will assist you with making your personal life a priority and keep you aligned personally so as you continue to ascend the ladder of success, you retain the most important things, including your mental and physical health, family, and relationships.

A personal board of advisors is necessary in every aspect of your career, and if you don’t have these people in your life, I urge you to get them as soon as possible.